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Jon C — 24 Comments

    • Joseph, I understand your frustration, after so many years! Unless you are still on supervision, though, the courts aren’t punishing you. I doubt they even put you on the registry… unless you are from CA or one of those early states? But either way, we know registration IS punishment, and some of the challenges out there (PA most recently, and OK and MD) have also declared registration to be punitive. We just have to keep fighting!

  1. Hey Jon.. you know they say good things come to those who wait. We all have our troubles in life. Sure I am on the sex offender registry as a lot of others but the thing is we are all created equal but its always nice to see a measure of faith in one’s heart to reach out to others in need. Now a lot of this sex offender hoopla will be over soon and those who persevere in good ways will be blessed. Helping others is always good.
    I know that it seems uncanny to talk at times about spiritual things but if one can’t understand spiritual things how can they understand carnal things and the right things to do to make things right not only for ourselves but for others. Oh and by the way prayer helps a lot also.

  2. What an encouraging story. I’m glad to hear there’s some success out there in this endeavor! I tried to get into “secular” therapy in order to treat offenders of all types, but every Graduate program I applied to denied or rescinded any offers when I disclosed my status. I begrudgingly gave up on that dream and am instead pursuing my original course (before the offense) in IT. It’s so easy to give up, but we have to keep fighting and proving that we are human beings.

  3. I am the wife of a sex offender. I led him to Jesus Christ. We are now married and have a baby. He is a reformed changed man and loves me and our child. We recently moved to Northwest,AR and have had harassment here. I’d like to know what I can do to help him. He works his butt off, leaves everyone alone, is very likeable but some treat him as less than human. I need to know his rights. I’d like to start a church for sex offenders. They certainly aren’t welcome there either.

    • I just joined this forum and saw your comment. Sorry I am a year late. I too am married to a great man whom has been given the title as a sex offender. I wold love to talk to you and I wish you and your family well.

  4. Congratulations on finding your calling. When I was in jail (internet chat with a detective), God told me there was a need for housing for felons, and particularly, sex offenders. After two years renting from a former gunnery Sargent (all he asked for was the truth at all times (and rent on-time)), I was led to buy a house in the area. I was blessed to have financial resources though everything else had either been taken away or thrown away. In the 7 years I owned that house, I had over 20 men and women come through. Several went on to productive lives.

    Two pieces of advice: 1) At the first opportunity, be honest and disclose your past, your current situation and your goals with your Preacher and the elders. Do the same with your immediate neighbors and your immediate boss.
    2) Forgive yourself. Jesus did. I know there are other ways to “success” in this world, but a Bible-teaching church played an important role in helping me regain my sanity and my sense of self-worth. If the first church does not extend a welcome to you, move to the next one. It’s not the sign over the door which is important, it’s the Spirit within. I attend a men’s Bible study at a church which requires me to be escorted per an approved/signed procedure in order to be on their grounds. It’s a small inconvenience. We do what we have to do and subjugate our pride. And that’s OK

    Sure, I am still under-employed, but I have re-married and my daughters have started talking to me again. Her children are slowly coming around as they think/believe I’m out to con their mom and take her for everything she’s got. I doubt there are any “easy” states for an RSO, but I’m not going to let that stop me from being satisfied with my life.

    Finally, There really ought to be a way to get off the dang registry. I’ve gotten myself on the Violent list with the associated predator label and there is no way off. I have zero credibility and now I get to have a big scarlet letter on my passport. I don’t know that I’ll even renew it when the Feds order me to allow it to be confiscated and to send it back to them. Papers Please? Me-> I have no papers. Go ahead and take me in.

  5. I came out of prison in March 2012 and by May I was in an I.T. course. Fast forward to 2017. I still can’t get ANY computer-related jobs. Do you have an I.T. career?

  6. This is an awesome example of just how church can help. I have a porn conviction from 2003. I started attending Celebrate Recovery in 2007 and have to say I recommend it highly. I now spend my time counseling other guys (usually married and the wife has found porn- their choice is, leave the porn or the wife.)
    My sexual addiction is just like any other addiction. With the right treatment and support, you can overcome it. I’ve given my testimony at CR all over SC and am met with nothing but kind support.
    Find a CR in your area and give it a try!!

  7. Stop identifying us a sex offenders, as if we continue to behave in this criminal manner! I’ve been placed on a civil registry for citizens who have offended sexually – but I am not a sex offender – I am a human being, loved and respected by people who know me better than you. How would you like for people to identify you every single day as a “Despicable Old Fart.” I could blog about how you’re such a wonderful Despicable Old Fart doing a great civic duty for those on civil registries. Our I could ask for you to join my movement for rehabilitating Despicable Old Farts like you.

    How about saying things like:

    for those who sexually offended in the past;
    men and women on the civil registry; or
    registered citizens.

    • Michael, thank you for your comments. NARSOL itself does try to avoid using the term “sex offender” as much as possible. The people telling their stories here, however, have their own voices and will from time to time end up using the term. If we were to make that many edits, the story would no longer belong to them. We hope you understand.

  8. Jon C., THANK YOU for providing your story and that you have chosen The Ministry, I am in Calif., and wish your program you cover was here, there are SO MANY more hearts/lives to be attended to here in one of THE Most populated States and lost souls and others that may just ‘give up hope’ and not see the light and take drastic turns, for the worse. And may take their own. Hopefully, with His Will, your calling will be brought here to this State in ends. You must see the Netflix show called “13 Reasons Why” reflecting cruel and sad self inflictment and others pretending to be the GP and the odd h.s. students as RC’s taking the crap for who they are and continual punishment for their past. Lessons to be learned even though it is the end of their H.S. years on alot on campus where they are tormented and and more than 1 takes their own life away, even though younger aged, CP is more common as it was on campus there, a faux location filmed in L.A. and the Bay Area. The whole point is that even from earlier age, we have offenders in the RC world and tougher for them to understand and accept post mortem (jail/prison sentencing)with their New Lives ahead that seems hopeless as rules go beyond living a convict life post Probation/Parole as an new RC(S.O.).
    That we live in a society that does NOT forgive and wants continual punishement and the labeling of all the same (crimes in the S.O. category) and treated the same after doing there time and denied housing, employment and living in the Tech World today, using limited use of social media attempting to a sense of normality where many after Prob/Par., canNOT use or better utlize apps, internet and other areas to reconnect with family and friends when jobs are scarce for RC’s. The folks here Jon C. need help/Counseling
    from non-gov point to not be re-thrown back into the system where they will want the assistance alike your program. He Blesses you for your new road to enlightenment and encouragement to the RC’s out there, and may your road be more non-eventful as you are guided to help these men and women. Kudos to you Jon C. thank you for your story and pic of a calming face to put a name to as others fear to be found nor want any PICS let alone the Registry again agonizing them and their loved ones anymore with pics on the interent/W.W.W. Peace

  9. Hello everyone. I hope my comment doesn’t offend anyone.Im not someone whos going through a registration problem but Im a mother of a 19 year old who has just been found guilty and is facing consequences of registration. Before all of this I personally have always disagreed witn this law that takes away human rights. Ive read heard and know stories of lives destroyed due to this. Only our Heavenly Father is the master of our lives. I never thought i would be going through this with my son . The hardest thing is the story behind it. The laws are unfair. And ok… Consequences are nedded i understand.. But registration is cruel. Ive read all of the comments and i sit here CRYING… Reading Pastors testimony and GOD’s calling regardless of it all…. There’s ALWAYS HOPE and GOD remains FAITHFUL.

    • Remember most of all Veronica, your son isn’t a different person just because of this conviction. Thank God we are all much more significant that just being the worst thing we have done. In the enormity of his life past and to come, this is simply one thing amoung many. Once he passes through the gauntlet, he can be restored to a life that will be better informed. Help him find a way to make meaning out if this experience that will launch him into a stronger tomorrow. It can be done. And with a sting mother, he will find encouragement. Chuck

      • Hello Chuck. Thank You for your words of encouragement. I must say ..GOD has been FAITHFUL. My son is serving his time and is doing better than i expected.. He stands strong Trusting and Believing God’s plans for his life are greater than the circumstances. He has realized who he is in Christ and how God’s CREATED him to be Greatness through the pain and battle. My son loves music He plays instruments and sings….. So were he is now there is a music room were he has the opportunity to play drums piano and guitar and he is writing songs. Singing and praising our heavenly father. I share this not to brag about my Son.But to GIVE GOD ALL THE HONOR.HE IS FAITHFUL. Chuck God has so much for u also CONTINUE to walk in his Glory. He is above it all. Trust the process.

  10. This week, I was blessed to have a long conversation with Jon as he shared just a small piece of his testimony. I’ve been on the registry since 2014, and felt quite defeated lately in my efforts to contribute to others using my talents. Jon reminded me that there is bondage in the negativity and fear of being a registered person. He encouraged me to stand strong and do what I’m led to do come what may. As he said, what more can they do to me, Im already on the registry. So long as I do not break the law, there is nothing else that they can do. Humiliate me, that ship sailed long ago, and I’ve learned to stand against that storm through many opportunities to practice. Jons enthusiasm is infectious. It made me want to pull up stakes, pack grandma into the car, and go out and join him. I am feeling so blessed this morning from his strong reminder that God is in control, and I should remember that. So much good advice that I already knew, but let slip from my awareness in the daily battle of being a registered citizen. Today is day 1 of getting back into the saddle and moving forward with vigor and purpose. Thank you Pastor Jon!

  11. I must say that I just came across this and after reading all the articles, tears are in my eye making harder and harder to continue to read. But I made it to the end. I am so proud of each and every person who has and is going through this fight. As it has already been stated, God id in control, we just need to see the path that he wants us to take, and to stay the course. I to like many of the writers here am a registered citizen, I got involved with being a state representative for NARSOL, and to help others like me. I had a wake up calling from the LORD while I was in jail waiting to settle my case. It was one night that I remember reading the bible with several guys in our unit (we were separated from the general population) we started a bible group in our unit and it went from just two of us to six of us (max unit population was 9) this was seen by the staff and we were watched all the time, this turned into a group meeting with an outside resource, which still to this day meets with men from this unit. But back to my calling, we had been reading about Paul or Saul at the time and he going around and killing those that he wanted, and his run in with the Lord ( light shinning down on him) well that night I was sleeping and at about 1:30 in the morning I was woke up to my name being called, I thought it was one of the guards on the intercom, so I answered and got no response, i went back to sleep, and a short time later was again woke up by a male voice calling my name, again i thought it was the guards and it was not, this time though the story of Saul came to mind. I again went back to sleep and yes for the third time I was a woke to my name being called out, this time all I did was say, “Lord, If that is you I here you and understand” at that moment I had a flushing feeling go over my body from Head to toe, still to this day every time i tell this story, I have that feeling. This was the Lord calling me to service. To which I have served all he has put in front of me, even those that meant me harm have fled. I am great full for the Grace, Mercy and faith the Lord has placed on me. He has helped me in other ways as well, I have a IT job and make more then most make in a two week check in as little as a day or two, sometimes hours. I continue to pray and that the Lord for what he has done, and to pass on what he has taught me. I’m also thankful that he put me in a therapy program that seen me for me, and not the monster so many “treatment programs see their clients as. I hope this has been helpful to just one person, just keep passing on the goodness that has been given, we / I was given mercy, I then must also be merciful to others. thank you and God bless each and every reader of this.

  12. Jon, thank you for your courageous post. I was a former pastor who was addicted to pornography. As my addiction progressed, I eventually broke every barrier I envisioned (with the exception of being sexual with someone in my congregation thank God) and was arrested. That was 2009. Ten years later and after a devastating relapse, five of which were spent in prison, I can say that while life is difficult, I wake most mornings grateful to God for another day to breath and make a living amends to my family, friends, and community.

    Since I have been home, I have focused on working my recovery, not reoffending, and helping others experience healing from addiction to compulsive sexual behaviors. While in prison I worked on a personal mission statement which I read regularly to reset my moral, spiritual, and ethical compass – My mission is to be be an honorable man and restore my spiritual legacy by being a blessing to my family, friends, and community. It reminds me to live on purpose and helps me in making choices consistent with who I am deep down in side.

    In July of last year I became a certified recovery coach because I want to help impaired clergy who struggle with these issues BEFORE they offend. In January I started my recovery coaching practice and am caring the message to pastors who are locked in a prison of shame and fear. I desire to provide confidential, hope based coaching to clergy who have nowhere to turn for fear of exposure and losing their jobs, families, and joy. It is slow going but I know this is my life calling and work.

    I pray that God continues to work in you and through you my brother! Thanks for having the courage to share your story!

  13. Hi Jon, thank you for your post. I am the Mother of a registrant in TN, my son was 19 when he was incarcerated and came home last week, he is now 23 and so happy to be home and so eager to start building his life, but it seems almost like the law wants him to fail so he will end up incarcerated again. I had moved so he could live with me when he comes home and it turns out the tip of my property is only 990 ft instead of required 1,000 ft away from the tip of a man’s property that allows people to tour a cave on his land so they are saying his land is a park. So instead we had to find alternate housing, which hasn’t been easy. I truly thought this nightmare was ending when he came home but I fear that prison was probably easier than the struggle he is about to face. I try to stay positive and tell him that he can accomplish anything he sets his mind to but in private I cry at the many ways this list is unfair and setting him up for failure.

  14. Hi Jon, We have a residential program for lifers in Los Angeles called The Francisco Homes. Of our 85 residents at least 20 have sex offenses. We are not State funded. Our residents pay the majority of the cost of housing while donations make up the rest. Keep up the good work. Blessings my friend.

  15. I have been on the registry going on 6 years now, and have also recently considered becoming a Pastor. Unfortunately, with this one and only offense on my record, I can’t even lock a job at McDonald’s. Businesses don’t even see what offense got me on the registry, but rather THAT I am on it, they deny me. It’s an uphill battle I face daily. I really don’t know how I’m going to get out of this rutt of hoping to find a job, or even one that will pay the bills and allow me to be financially stable.

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